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Can't buy me love: How to date when you're low on funds

Almost everything has become more expensive in the past few years — even looking for love.
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Fresh flowers and balloons are on display at a grocery store in St. John's, N.L. on Friday, February 2, 2024. THE CANADIAN PRESS/Sarah Smellie

Almost everything has become more expensive in the past few years — even looking for love.

"Similar to their day-to-day lives, (people) are making adjustments in the dating world as well in terms of how much they're going to spend," said Gayle Ramsay, head of everyday banking, segment and customer growth at the Bank of Montreal.

While inflation has cooled, thanks to higher interest rates tamping down the economy, the cost of dining out and groceries remain elevated and budgets tight.

"When you factor that in, it does have an impact in terms of what you're going to spend on a date," said Ramsay.

The BMO survey found more than half of single Canadians said they're going on fewer dates or looking for less expensive dating activities as rising costs take a toll on their wallets.

Canadians on average spend $173 on each date, including the cost of commuting, getting ready for the date and spending on food, beverages and tickets, the survey showed.

Andrea Lo, a dating coach and founder of Toronto Dating Hub, said something as simple as going out for drinks has become more expensive than it used to be.

Besides, there are several phases of dating, she explained: courting, exclusivity, then making it official. That could take up to three months and several dinners, coffee dates and hangouts, she said.

The BMO survey showed single Canadians could spend as much as $3,621 on dates before making a relationship official.

On the other side of the equation, the high cost of finding love is discouraging many Canadians from dating at all. The survey found 42 per cent had adjusted plans for a date for financial reasons, while nearly a third cancelled dates to save money.

Ramsay said while inflation has hurt people across the board, men seem to feel more pressured and conscious about their financial wellness.

Nearly half of single men surveyed said their net worth affected their dating prospects.

Lo said people need to get creative with their date ideas without breaking the bank.

She pointed out there are many non-financial ways people can show they're interested in their potential partner — such as being attentive or asking great questions during conversation to show interest.

Lo also suggested some affordable but charming date ideas, including going to a unique mom-and-pop shop to get a drink or tea, instead of a chain restaurant or café.

"If you tell me it's Tim Hortons (for a date) ... it's just icky," she said. "Even Starbucks, sure, it's an upgrade, but Starbucks is your most basic, vanilla option."

Other cute but affordable date ideas on Lo's list include outdoor activities such as free community skating rinks or skating trails; tobogganing; hiking or getting a hot chocolate.

"Skating is always a great one. You can maybe hold hands," she said. Long drives to catch sunset or sunrise, going to local farmers markets on the weekends and getting ice cream together never go out of style, Lo said.

"(Go) stargazing if they're more of a night owl. It's very romantic. Bring the blanket, bring some booze and a flask," she said.

Lo suggested taking advantage of free or discounted activities cities and towns host such as weekday museum nights or pub games.

But Lo warned to not appear frugal, such as not buying a drink at a free event or skipping paid parking and risking a ticket.

"The bare minimum, if you go to a bar that has a trivia night, you should at least buy a drink," she said.

Ramsay suggested singles could also set a certain amount of money aside for dating each month, essentially building it into your budget.

"Dating is one of those things that you need to plan for and have a budget for" Ramsay said.

While everyone manages money differently, she suggested people allocate things like drinks or meals under entertainment, for example.

"It is what I would call a discretionary piece," she said.

This report by The Canadian Press was first published Feb. 14, 2025.

Ritika Dubey, The Canadian Press